GROW UP MY SISTERS...

He won’t use condoms, U use pills..
why? Because he wants it natural?
(think of ovarian cancer and infertility).

He gets u pregnant, U have aborted like
5 times.. why? Because he is not
ready! GROW UP!

He is tired of natural place for copulation,
He moves to your ass Saying 'its tighter'
Then u begin to leak n smell..
why? Because u want to please and not
loose him.. GROW UP!

You have been wearing his engagement
ring for close to 4yrs,
He is not wearing any.. why?
Because he has promised u marriage.
GROW UP!

MY SISTER.
He wants a Blow job Yet he won’t give
you head.. why? Cos he feels u are
not so clean “there”. GROW UP MY SISTER!

You dress half naked thinking u look sexy
and Hot, He isn’t complaining But he
has more cloths on. Don’t be surprised
when he takes a more decent girl home.
GROW UP LADY!

A guy dumps u, u wanna pay him back and
all u could do is to sleep with his friend?
and u think this is pay back? hahaha!
MY SISTER GROW UP!

U think getting pregnant for him will make
him marry u? GROW UP GIRL!

U become a single mama with No Job,
No means of feeding your Baby and
yourself so... U leave junior with Grandma
and U go back to the Hustling field,
then u begin to say, "MEN Are Wicked!"
Whose fault?

Please ladies, be wise!
You know u deserve better than this.
Don't always be at the loosing end!!!

What Husbands Can Do For Their Pregnant Wives....#strongafricanwoman

Being pregnant isn't easy. There are many emotions, frustrations, pains and complexities involved in carrying a child for nine months. Men must know this! However, I have heard a number of pregnant women gripe about how their husband's idea of supporting them throughout the pregnancy was to capitalize on their cravings.

Dear Husband / Father-To-Be,

You planted your seed and did your duty. WRONG! Now's the time to step up and show your wife how much you care. Confused? You don't know what she wants? Don't worry... here are some quick tips on how to show some love and appreciation to your wife throughout the remainder of her pregnancy.

Sincerest regards,

The Deliberate (and pregnant) Mom

THE List for Daddy-To-Be

#Listen
We always need our man to listen to us but now is more important than ever! Hear our woes. Sympathize with our worries. Sincerely listen and hear what we are saying.

#Help
Oh my goodness, there's no better time to pick up a vacuum cleaner, wash the dishes, do the laundry or make the occasional supper! We are tired and we need help. If you don't want to fall victim to the onslaught of pregnant, hormonal explosions of frustration, then make sure to help out around the house. A side note to the ladies... compliment him GREATLY for how he helped (even if he didn't do it the way you would do it)... he's more likely to volunteer to help out again.

#Be at her beckoned call
If she's craving a grape slushie when it's -35 outside, don't try to talk her down from her craving. Get out there and drive around the city to find the perfect grape slushie. Trust me... these are memories in the making and although it seems odd or frustrating now, you'll both laugh about it years later.

#Take her on a date
Just because she's carrying your child doesn't mean that you're off the hook for taking your lady out on the town. Take her out to dinner, see a movie, or simply browse in a book shop and afterwards go out for tea/coffee.

#Be eager
If your wife is ecstatic about a birthing or parenting class, try your best to share in her excitement. Even if you have to fake your enthusiasm... do it! In her pregnant brain, the lack of excitement = lack of excitement about the baby and/or her.

#Show a little romance
She needs to know you love her... pregnant or not! However, an extra showering of romance can help smooth over her rough days or emotional moments. A random greeting card professing your love for her, slow dancing in the living room, a bouquet of flowers, a sappy slide show... there's so many things you can do to help her feel loved.

#Book a spa treatment for her
A month or two before the baby is due, surprise her with a spa treatment. A manicure, pedicure or massage can really help relieve some of her pregnancy aches and pains.

#Help her relax
There are a lot of physical and emotional stresses that accompany a pregnancy. Find ways to help your wife relax. You could prepare a bubble bath for her, give her a shoulder or foot rub, or surprise her with a magazine.

#Book housecleaning services for her
A month before the baby is due, while she's out visiting, shopping, or at her baby shower, schedule a top to bottom professional housecleaning. Coming home to an immaculate home could make the world of difference to her. Another great tip is to book some additional housecleaning services for a couple months following the birth of the baby.

#Treat her to some great maternity clothes
A great maternity wardrobe can help your wife embrace and accept her changing body. Take her to the mall and let her take all the time she wants trying on jeans and shirts.

#Let her know you think she's beautiful (inside and out)
Trust me, she's feeling frumpy and far from sexy. Remind her of all the things you love and adore about her.

Trust me when you play your role during this moment, you both enjoy the whole time together and you ease your woman's pains and burdens during the whole time ....... This is a wonderful time that is to be cherished and remembered forever......

I #love my mom ]

Your #Mother carried you inside of her womb for nine whole months, she felt sick for months with nausea, then she watched her feet swell and her skin stretch and tear.

She struggled to climb stairs, she got breathless quickly and even a simple task like putting her shoes on was a huge struggle for her. She suffered many sleepless nights while you kicked and squirmed inside of her and while you demanded that she scoffed junk at 3am, she then went through EXCRUCIATING PAIN to bring you into this world.

She became your nurse, your chef, your maid, your chauffeur, your biggest fan, your teacher, your agony aunt and your best friend. She's struggled for you, cried over you, fought for you, put herself second for you, hoped the best for you and has driven herself insane with worry for you but never has she asked for anything in return because she loves you and did it all on love alone!

Most of us take our Mums for granted but there are people who have lost or have never even seen theirs. If you have a loving Mother who did all of this for you, you are very lucky, never devalue her worth because one day, you'll wish you hadn't!.

To every woman who is a mother, and to every other woman who is going to be one day...#strongafricanwoman

You Will Never Lose a Battle When Prayer Is Your Weapon!

The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace. ~Exodus 14:14

I know sometimes you want to crawl up in a corner and Pray to God that your problems just go away. But, that’s not exactly how it works! Problems are meant to be defeated, We should not be defeated by our problems. If God took away every problem that we encountered, every time we prayed, We would never know how it feels to overcome them. You can’t have a victory without winning the battle, just as you can’t have a testimony without passing God’s test. Instead of praying for God to take your problems away, Pray for Him to give you strength to conquer them. Today, get in the mindset: “I will not be defeated… I may have a big problem, but MY GOD is bigger! Ask God to protect you and fight your battles for you. I assure you, the Battle is already won because God never loses a battle!

“Lord, Today I pray for Your protection. I know that nothing is going to happen to me, that You and I together can’t handle. Give me the strength to overcome any obstacle I may encounter today. When I feel like all hope is gone, renew my Faith and Trust in You. In Jesus Name, Amen!''...

31 Ways To Pray For Our Husbands .....

I found this Inspiring….for both Married & Unmarried

1. That he would draw close to God.

2. That he would grow in wisdom.

3. That he would stand strong against the pull of this world and the spiritual warfare behind it.

4. That he would be a strong spiritual leader.

5. That his faith would increase.

6. That he would trust God when providing for his family.

7. That he would be free from stress.

8. For good health.

9. That he would be a Godly example at home and at work.

10. That he would seek God with a pure and humble heart.

11. That he would have compassion for the world around him.

12. That he would fulfill the responsibilities given to him
such as being a husband, a father and an employee.

13. That he would be content with little or with much.

14. That he would run to God in times of trouble.

15. That his prayer life would be strengthened.

16. That he would understand and embrace his role as a husband.

17. That he will be obedient to the will of God.

18. That he would practice servant leadership as Christ demonstrated to His disciples.

19. That he would have much patience.

20. That he will learn to bridle his tongue.

21. That serving God would be his first priority in life.

22. That God will continually transform you into the wife your husband needs.

23. That he would have a heart of gratitude.

24. That he will be self-controlled in every area of his life.

25. That he would be a man of strong character.

26. That he will hunger and thirst for the word of God.

27. That his faith would be sincere and genuine.

28. That God would put a hedge of protection around your marriage.

29. That he will fellowship with other believers and that God would bring strong men of faith into his life.

30. That he will guide and nurture the growth of his children.

31. That he will testify of his faith to others.

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6 Signs To Know You Are A Bad Spouse .....

You do not listen

Are you someone who likes to talk and talk all the time? If so then the chances are that you are a bad listener and your spouse is tired of having no one who’ll listen to them. Hearing and listening are very different things. If you are quietly hearing what your partner is saying without paying much attention to the subject matter then that’s not listening. Listening takes effort and concentration especially if your partner has communication problems. Honestly ask yourself if you really listen to your partner or just pretend to listen while dreaming silly day dreams in your head

You Don’t talk
As important listening is, talking is just as important if not more. The opposite extreme is of the partner who never talks. You might be a good listener but you also need to be able to express your own feelings well. If you can’t do that then your partner will never be able to know how you really feel. It is important to be able to talk and express your feelings and point of views, without which the relationship is bound to fail sooner or later. You can’t expect your partner to instinctively understand your every thought without you vocalizing it or communicating in any other way.

You work a lot
If you are a workaholic then chances are that your relationship isn’t going well. How can it when you spend most of your time at work. A lot of people just need to work a lot to stay happy. Such people try to justify their addiction to work by rationalizing that they are doing it for their family’s sake. But the best thing you can give your family is not money but time. If you are a workaholic and stay a workaholic even after finding an interesting partner then you are a bad spouse.

You are controlling
If you are the kind of person who likes to stay in charge then you could be a bad spouse. It all depends on how extreme this part of your nature is. If you want to control so much that you manipulate and bully and dominate the other person completely then you are definitely a bad spouse. You might think that you are doing it for their benefit but it’s just a rationalization. The best thing you can do for anyone is to help them be independent

You try to flatter
The opposite of the controlling manipulative type is the people pleaser. Some people are just submissive and try to please everyone they meet. They do this the most with their partner. So much that it becomes flattery. While this might help inflate the ego of your partner and might work for a while, it’s not a recipe for a successful marriage. Just as dominating isn’t right, submitting isn’t right either. Both partners need to be independent and co-dependent in a delicate balance.

You can not control your anger
If you are one of those people who get angry at small things all the time then you are going to make a bad spouse in spite of whatever good qualities you have. The truth is that there will be fights in a marriage and if you can’t control your anger it will be very hard for your partner to always love you. If you’ve ever hit your partner then you should just accept that you are the worst type of partner out there. If you just verbally abusive when you are angry, you don’t win any prizes either. The hallmark of a good spouse is to stay calm during arguments and always be civil and respect their partner.

Note: This post is to help you improve in your marriage, take the criticisms as gifts!

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LADIES, THESE ARE THE KEYS TO ATTRACTING MEN THAT ARE CHRISTIANS FOR MARRIAGE.............................

What's the best way to attract a Christian Man you might ask, considering that there is a lot of rubbish out there about attracting men, a lot of women have been made to think that the only way to get a guys attention is to dress half naked. Dressing half naked will certainly get you some attention - the wrong kind, from guys who have only one motive - getting laid. If you want advice on attracting men that are decent and love God then you can't go to the world for that information because they can only teach how to attract worldly men, and most worldly men are only interested in one thing - yeap you guessed it!. The funny thing is that even the 'so called' bad boys will go to the girls that let it all hang out for fun and sex, but when it comes to settling down in a long term relationship they are looking for a good and decent girl. So you have to decide which one you want to be, the girl that attracts men who are only looking to get laid or the girl that attracts men who are looking for a long term relationship. How you present yourself greatly determines the kind of guys you will attract. So in response to your Christian dating question on attracting men, here are 6 Godly ways to attract Christian Men

5 WAYS TO MAGNET CHRISTIAN MEN FOR MARRIAGE
1. The first key to attracting men is to Present yourself well. How you present yourself speaks volumes. Prayer will do its part in attracting a good Christian man to you but you must also do your part by making sure you present yourself well. If prayer alone was enough Esther wouldn't have made all that effort to appear before the king.
You have to remember that men are visual, even the Christian ones and I should know because I am one myself. A guy has to like what he see' you have to present yourself in a way that gets his attention without looking trashy and cheap.

2. The second key to attracting men is to Be confident and secure in yourself. Confidence in itself can make you look attractive. Every guy wants a confident woman. A woman confident in herself, a woman secure in herself, a woman who knows her worth and value and won't settle for just anything and anyone. Men are attracted to that confidence. If you are confident in yourself and learn to love yourself for who you are and the way you look, that will shine through in your personality and the way you carry yourself. Haven't you noticed those women who are not the most beautiful in terms of what we consider natural beauty (whatever natural beauty is to you), but they are confident and still take pride in themselves and their appearance and they end up with a really handsome and godly guy and the other women can't figure out how she did it.

3. The third key to attracting men is to be Friendly and have a soft smiley face. Be someone that people easily get along with, have a reputation for being caring and kind and just being an all round good person.
Learn to wear a smile on your face, I mean if a guy wanted to approach you and you had a 'don't you dare come anywhere near me' kind of face, he will think twice before even saying hello. Have a friendly face that won't scare a guy away. Be a person that's easy to talk to and strike conversations with, relationships are often birthed out of friendships so learn to be friendly.

4. The fourth key to attracting men is to Be respectful. One of the major things that attracts a guy is a woman that has respect for others because he knows that if she respects others she will respect him as her man. More important than beauty is your personality and character, beauty might attract a guy but character and personality will determine whether he stays. Show respect and honor to others, don't be rude to people, one thing about guys is that we observe from afar at first before approaching, especially in church. We might observe a lady we are interested in for weeks and months before making a move, we want to see what she is like, what her reputation is like, what she is like with people. In that time of observation if you see that the lady is rude and loud and has no respect for people then you start to think to yourself that she might treat you that way and disrespect you if you were to hook up with her and you probably switch your interest to another lady after that.

5. The fifth key to attracting men is Be a lover of God. When you truly love God it will shine through in everything you do. Every Christian man admires a lady who is truly a lover of God and spirit filled. 

Let's learn how to make your relationship last for long .....

#Choose your partner. Like you choose a friend, you can't choose someone who's dishonest or someone who's beliefs will conflict with yours and cause troubles. Don't confuse lust or infatuation for love.

#Respect each other. Respect each other. Respect each other.!

#It's not a guessing game and both of you are NOT mind readers. Tell each other your needs instead of hiding them then being angry when you are not satisfied. Know your needs and tell your partner about them clearly.

#Talk....Communicate....Bond...Connect! Everyday.
Even when you are away from each other, you have to check in, be updated. Don't wait them to call. It doesn't have to be a long talk always, you can't connect together if you don't know what going on in each others lives.

#Be honest, don't lie, don't cheat. Be clear and honest because hiding things makes everything just worse. ok?

#Discuss important issues (money, children, etc) early. Know what he/she thinks about relationships. You need someone who thinks that honesty, openness and commitment are the base of a realationship. You don't want someone who's dishonest or just want to wander and play/bitch around while they are with you!

#Never assume. Don't assume your partner's intentions. If you don't like/understand something they did, ask and talk about it. Get the right idea.

#Be good to yourself and to each other. Think about each other and consider each other's feelings. Pay attention to your partner needs.Before making a new decision, think (Will this make him/her happy?).
#For guys : you have to be good listeners . Listen truly and pay attention.
#For women: Generally, nagging him isn't a good thing.

#To men : Don't you ever dare to forget her birthday and anniversaries.
#To women: Never make him jealous.
[ A fact women should know about men : ]
When serious and willing commit, men think alot even more than women do.

#Stop doing things they hate or things that annoy your partner. How do you expect the relationship to last, then? For guys and girls (specially girls) just stop it! Stop being stubborn, it's not a war Don't let your ego destroy the relationship.Allow some space for compliance and devotion.

#Do/make things they love. Remember what they love and keep it in mind as it might be a sweet gift someday. Remember which coat or which necklace she liked when you were shopping. Remember things he/she loves and do it, this means you would do anything for them, your partner will appreciate it.

#Be best friends, get intimate, talk to each other and listen to each other. This requires honesty, closeness, self-disclosure and working on it, it doesn't happen by itself! Get close and don't hide your feelings, never think your partner will belittle you or get angry because you are talking about your feelings/thoughts. Never hide or pretend.
It's really, really important.

#Don't forget to work hard to maintain intimacy and closeness. A good relationship is a life-long continuous process that needs continuous work and attention. That's extremely important.

#Say "I love you" frequently and when you mean it.

#Compliment each other, tell each other "I love you" this help your partner to feel they are not taken for granted.
Well, you have to trust that you will stay together forever but it doesn't mean you stop showing love.
For women: Men, too need some love!... and care! Yes, even men need to be told that you love them.

#Apologize :For couples and married people, everybody: Apologize when you are wrong. Make up after you fight. You can say I'm sorry in a quit way, in a funny way, in a sarcastic way, just apologize when you make a mistake, please.

#Every relationship has its ups and downs. Love is a feeling that fluctuates up and down depending on how you treat each other and solve your problems. Discover new ways of connection and interaction, work together through these hard times then your relationship will become stronger than ever. That's important.

#Bring back the old days of flirting and fun. Do something nice or have fun together. Even for busy and married couples, go to a movie, a date. Even if you can't, play a game at home, watch something, joke around or have a long warm and intmate talk.
Enrich your relationship and spice it by travelling to new places and finding new interests and hobbies you both like. (may be I can post a separate topic about that)

#Consider them always. Think for two persons. Ask them before making a new decision because everything you both do will affect both of you.You are a team! Sometimes we have choose based on what's better for the relationship or family instead of what's better for one's self.

#Share and support their wills, dreams and passion. And make new dreams together!

#Be good to yourself and to your partner. Have self-esteem. Stay healthy and for each other....

Disagreements!

Disagreement is a must for two strangers living together for the first time. The only thing is that you must watch your utterances, do not throw baits with hurtful words. Sometimes you just need to let the other person rave and rant and when he/she calms down, those words come back to haunt and then it would be necessary to apologize. Men, never be too proud to apologize to your wives, women please try to calm down when your husbands say things that you obviously know they don't mean, no cursing, no threatening because really that is your better half...

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Ten things good friends don't do.

1. They don’t gossip behind your back.
True friends distance themselves from unnecessary drama. If a close one spreads rumors or shares secrets that you asked to be kept private, then they aren’t a true friend worthy of your trust.

2. They don’t resort to personal attacks.
True friends aren’t in the business of making you feel bad about yourself. They communicate with words of kindness, not cruelty. They focus on your similarities, not your differences. They speak of your qualities, not your shortcomings.

3. They don’t start pointless arguments.
True friends know that there is nothing less productive than starting an argument you can’t win. “Reading that status update sure made me rethink my entire existence,” said nobody, anywhere, ever. A true friend should be willing to accept a person as they are, whether they agree or not. This isn’t to say you can’t have friends you disagree with (in fact, I highly recommend it as it puts things in perspective). But if you’re going to argue, do so respectfully.

4. They don’t interrupt your every word.
True friends aren’t so obsessed with themselves that they aren’t interested in how you feel. A fair and balanced friendship can’t exist in a situation where one half does all of the talking and none of the listening.

5. They don’t discourage you from pursuing your goals.
True friends are willing to offer feedback without mincing words if they feel it is necessary for your personal development, but they don’t do so in a condescending or hateful fashion. Instead, they offer constructive, helpful advice that inspires you to become a better version of yourself.

6. They don’t look down on you for your past.
True friends aren’t concerned with your past, no matter how colorful it might be. If you’re courageous enough to reveal a few skeletons living in your closet, a true friend shouldn’t think any less of you; instead, they should offer you comfort and support, expressing an appreciation for your willingness to open up.

7. They don’t abandon you in social situations.
True friends are emotionally intelligent enough to know that bringing a friend to a party where they don’t know anyone, and then proceeding to throw them to the fishes, is a very inconsiderate thing to do (especially if said friend happens to be an introvert).

8. They don’t get jealous of your success.
True friends don’t waste their time in a pit of jealousy when something good happens to another person. They know it is much more productive to be happy for other people’s success (and maybe even take some notes about how they did it), than it is to be pout and play the “Why didn’t they pick me?” game. Less complaining, more hustling.

9. They don’t judge you or try to “fix” you.
True friends know it’s silly to try to “fix” a person while their own inner-houses are in disorder. As Jesus Christ said, “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.” Recall that Jesus spent most of the Gospels hanging out with the very sinners people love to judge today instead of the moralizing Pharisees, who were so blinded by judgment that they couldn’t take an honest look at themselves and their own faults. True friends can admit that they themselves are far from perfect, so it’s a bit absurd to expect anything more from another person. You might not be perfect, but you are good enough, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

10. They don’t take your friendship for granted.
True friends don’t see a relationship as a short-term fling that can be tossed aside when it becomes inconvenient, but rather a long-term commitment of high importance. A friend worth having isn’t only interested in doing fun stuff like drinking Tequila shots, playing miniature golf, watching goofy videos on the Internet, riding roller coasters, lounging on the beach or dancing at the club; they are also willing to help you through difficult times by doing things like supporting you after a death in the family, and encouraging you to put yourself back together after a brutal break-up or unexpected job loss. Will Smith captured this top trait of true friends when he said, “If you’re absent during my struggle, don’t expect to be present during my success........

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REMINDER TO MEN -Fatherhood begins in the womb ..

MEN NOTE - There is nothing quite like a woman who is nearing the end of her pregnancy. She is a bundle of physical, mental and emotional issues. She is perhaps more tired than she has ever been in her life. Her back aches and her legs hurt. She is often impatient for the baby to come yet nervous about how much there is to do to get ready. And she may feel anxious about the responsibility of her first or next baby.
Dad's job during this important time is to be a support and help for his partner. And as the baby's delivery nears, you will need to be watching for some important signs about the impending birth. Knowing what labor is about, what to expect, and what the various stages mean is a very important part of a father's role....
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Black women; who are we and where are we going?

Today one of them is respect and having respect for ourselves and others. It seems as though respecting ourselves and having respect for others have declined since the yesteryear. As a black woman, I see some of us have forgotten our true worth. One would think that we would have a greater appreciation for ourselves, our men and others now from what we have come from, but to me it has gotten worse. “Too much is given, much is required.” It’s so ironic how men these days will disrespect women and as women we are so accepting of it because we just don’t seem to notice or say anything about it because the respect for our own self is so unconscious and dead.

Women have completely started to switch roles; playing the roles in their homes as both woman and man; mother and father because men have seem to have lost their direction and purpose in what is needed and required of them. They have lost what I would say the motivation of being a man because we have some way stopped them from becoming men. Our black men have been demonized and labeled as being lazy, liars, cheaters and irresponsible; however, in some cases they actually accept the roles and play them successfully, but it’s not the majority, it’s only a hand few that do partake in that behavior but let society tell it there is no solution for any of this.

Society has a way by judging you and making you feel insignificant at the same time so our black men have fallen into this stereotype. What I see in my generation, we are victims to a falling society; where society will suck you in and spit you out. Black women are taking their material things and their accomplishments and wearing it as a badge of honor, when in reality they are walking around with no clue of who they really are and what they are trying to be. Topics like this don’t take a lot of effort for me because it’s such a conscious state of mind to me. My fear and I am aware of it is me being sucked under; losing all control and having to be someone I’m not and eventually just settling to be.

I don’t want to ever be a settling ass woman, accepting any and everything just for placement to fit; for the sake of saying ” I have a man” or for the status quota to have a place in society. I want to always be a proud, young black woman; proud of the woman I’m becoming; proud of the decisions I make; proud that I am a self-reliant woman; proud of loving myself totally and completely; proud of being in love with God because once I do that everything else about me will evolve .

That’s the difference between a lot of women yesterday and today, we haven’t taken the time or the effort to make our own self proud. Yes a lot of women back in the day didn’t work and wasn’t granted same rights but they had a duty to keep themselves together. They had nothing to lose because nothing was given to them. These days everybody is on social media and its really becoming a surreal life to some people. That's real cute and nice but who are you and where are you going in your life?..

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The Strong African Woman ...: A hot-and-cold attitude !!

The Strong African Woman ...: A hot-and-cold attitude !!