A hot-and-cold attitude !!

A hot-and-cold attitude toward someone who has made it clear they love you isn't just confusing for them... it's damaging. Bottom Line: Just because you are unclear of YOUR feelings doesn't give you the right to mess with someone else's!

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MEN!!

Men:You can't change them; they can only change themselves. You can't force them; they choose their own path. You can't create a loving relationship all by yourself; they have to participate and join you. You can't make them see their mistakes; life does that for you—later.

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A real man should never feel threatened by the success of his girlfriend, fiancee or wife. Its time for men to redefine what their role in a relationship is. Man is the head of a home.

However society has somehow misconstrued and redefined this role of men solely by their ability to provide bread. But there's a huge difference between bread-winnership and leadership.

A real man provides both. However the absence of bread-winnership does not mean a man should abdicate his leadership role.

In today's society where more and more women are increasingly becoming more empowered socially, economically and politically; its an outmoded way of thinking that any woman's role in a home should be restricted to just culinary or sexual or reproductive roles. We're not in Afghanistan!

If you're ever in a position where your wife or girlfriend earns more than you do, there's really no need to feel threatened or develop a complex. Just keep providing quality leadership, guidance and direction, your season will come. Man shall not live by bread alone.

Celebrate success and the wonderful women in your life!♥
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If you’re in a relationship, intimate or platonic, the tips below will come in handy…

1. Let go of old wounds through forgiveness.
Every moment of your life you are either growing or dying – and when you are physically healthy, it’s a choice, not fate. You have to let go of what’s behind you before you can grasp the goodness in front of you. 

2. Come clean when you make a mistake.
An honest heart is the beginning of everything that is right with this world. The most honorable people of all are not those who never make mistakes, but those who admit to them when they do, and then go on and do their best to right the wrongs they’ve made. In the end, being honest might not always win you a lot of friends and lovers, but it will always keep the right ones in your life.

3. Stop gossiping and start communicating.
A good rule of thumb: If you can’t say it to their face, you shouldn’t say it behind their back

4. Give others the space to make their own decisions.
Stop judging others by your own past. Never act, judge, or treat people like you know them better than they know themselves. They are living a different life than you are.
Allow the people in your life to make their own mistakes and their own decisions

5. Do things that make YOU happy.
If you want to awaken happiness in a relationship, start by living a life that makes you happy and then radiate your happiness into your relationship

6. Show your loved ones your kindness in small ways every day.
Aesop once said, “No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. Always be kinder than necessary. You never know what someone is going through.

7. Say less when less means more.
Pay attention and be a good listener. Your ears will never get you in trouble

8. Let your love and trust overpower your fear.
You never lose by loving; you lose by holding back. No relationship is impossible until you refuse to give it a chance. Love means giving someone the chance to hurt you, but trusting them not to. Without this trust, a relationship cannot survive.

9. Accept, don’t expect.
Unconditional acceptance is something we want, but rarely ever give out. Remember, people never do anything that is out of character.

10. Let the wrong ones go.
Know your worth! When you give your time to someone who doesn’t respect you, you surrender pieces of your heart you will never get back. All failed relationships hurt, but losing someone who doesn’t appreciate and respect you is actually a gain, not a loss. Some people come into your life temporarily simply to teach you something. They come and they go and they make a difference. It’s perfectly okay that they’re not in your life anymore. You now have more time to focus on the relationships that truly matter......
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An Anointing Message To Fathers ...

As men you should be taking the lead in the direction to move to care for your loved ones, your communities and supporting your churches. Fathers have a historical responsibility and spiritual accountability to place your families above your personal needs. You cannot nor should not be selfish in your love for family, devotion to God, giving to community and mentoring to youth. These things as men you should pray and act on to improve yourselves.

1. Fathers, should go to Jesus in prayer and pray with their children and families. Leading prayer as the leader of the household.

2. Fathers, make mistakes, but own up to them and correct the mistakes they have made. Working not to repeat them and modeling responsibility.

3. Fathers, discipline their children with love and not with physical violence, verbal degradation or emotional manipulation.

4. Fathers, take their children/families to church and bible study to receive the Word of God and meditate on these words to empower, inspire and strengthen the family unit.

5. Fathers, are not perfect and should not try to be perfect, ask God for wisdom, direction and discernment.

6. Fathers, don't blame others for their weakness, but work to strengthen themselves in the Word of God through prayer and reading of scripture.

7. Fathers, will not "follow the guys" when they are disrespecting women, this sets an inappropriate and dangerous model for their sons to follow.

8. Fathers, don't block their children's anointing with ungodly actions and modeling that may be repeated by their children as they mature into adults.

9. Fathers, ask for discernment to recognize the signs of trouble, chaos and confusion before they happen.

10. Fathers, model respect for the spirit of the church and church representation.

11. Fathers, lead grace/prayer at meal time and anoint their children with oil.

12. Fathers, should be able to purchase their daughters personal items and be proud in doing so. Setting a standard of respect, pride and responsibility for the young lady he protects and loves.

13. Fathers, promote education in the household. Reading should come before video games, television or play time.

14. Fathers, talk to their children about drugs and sex before the street or television does.

15. Fathers, do not whine about what "HIS" daddy did not do for him, but follow a model indicative of Godly men and accountability.

16. Fathers, do not blame where he came from for his short-comings. He focuses on where he is going in a positive direction.

17. Fathers, takes time to visit their children's school and talk to teachers about their children's progress, strengths, and challenges.

18. Fathers, will happily sacrifice for their family, showing how God’s love sacrificed for all of us.

19. Fathers, accept responsibility for their children's actions. Remembering that “the apple does not fall far from the tree.” Fathers recognize and work to stop generational curses so a new and positive direction is made for his children.

20. Fathers, will visit their children and spend time with them even though he may not be present in the home. A true father takes responsibility for a life that they helped create and a true mother/woman allows the father to do this and puts her feelings aside to allow a father to be a father.

21. Fathers, aren't afraid to show love to their children, children still need reinforcement that they are loved and respected by their father. Love cannot be bought, bartered, compromised, sold, exchanged. Love is a action word and actions speak louder than words.

22. Fathers, spend time just being together with their children and doing things their children like and will remember doing.

23. Fathers, teach your child to be responsible and accountable for their actions. Not to blame others for their actions or think they are owed anything. Respect is always earned.

24. Fathers must teach and model respect to women for their sons and respect to men by their daughters. Sex must be taken seriously not as a game, violence is not acceptable by men or women. Fathers must lead in the understanding of this.

25. Fathers must teach respect, honor, and fear of the Lord.

Quote:
A truly humble man is sensible of his natural distance from God; of his dependence on Him; of the insufficiency of his own power and wisdom; and that it is by God's power that he is upheld and provided for, and that he needs God's wisdom to lead and guide him, and His might to enable him to do what he ought to do for Him. Edwards, Jonathan

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WORDS FROM A FATHER TO A SON ABOUT MARRIAGE...

1. My son, if you keep spending on a woman and she never asked you if you’re saving or investing, and she keeps enjoying the attention, don’t marry her. 

2. My son, a woman could be a good wife to you, some could be a good mother to your children but if you’ve found a woman like a mother to you, your children and your family, please don’t let her go.

3. My son, don’t confine the position of your wife to the kitchen, where did you get that from? Even in our days, we had farm-lands where they worked every morning . . . that was our office.

4. My son, if I tell you that you’re the head of the house, don’t look at your pocket; look if you will see a smile on your wife’s face.

5. My son, if you want to have a long life, let your wife be in-charge of your salary, it will be difficult for her to spend it when she’s aware of the home needs and bills to pay but if it’s in your care, she will keep you asking even when all has been spent.

6. My son, don’t ever beat your woman, the pain in her body is nothing to be compared to the wound on her heart and that means you may be in trouble living with a wounded woman.

7. My son, now that you’re married, if you live a bachelor kind of life with your wife, you will soon be single again.

8. My son, in our days, we had many wives and many children because of our large farm-lands and many harvests, there are hardly any land for farming anymore, so embrace your woman closely.

9. My son, under the cocoa tree that I did meet your mother could be your eateries and restaurants of nowadays, but remember, the closet thing we did there was to embrace each other.

10. My son, don’t be carried away when you start making more money, instead of spending on those tiny legs that never knew how hard you worked to get it, spend it on that woman that stood by you all along.

11. My son, when I threw little stones or whistled at the window of your mother father’s house, to call her out, it was not for sex, it was because I missed her so much.

12. My son, remember, when you say your wife has changed, there could be something you’ve stopped doing too.

13. My son, your mother, Asake rode the bicycle with me before I bought that tortoise car outside there, any woman that won’t endure with you in your little beginning should not enjoy your riches.

14. My son, don’t compare your wife to any woman, there are ways she’s enduring you too and has she ever compared you to any man?

15. My son, there is this thing you people call feminism, well, if a woman claim to have equal right with you in the house, divide all the bills into two equal parts, take one part and ask her to start paying the other part.

16. My son, I met your mother a virgin and I took more yams to her father, if you don’t meet your wife a virgin, don’t blame her, what I didn’t tell you is that our women had prestige.

17. My son, I didn’t send your sisters to school because I was foolish like many to think a female child won’t extend my family name, please don’t make that mistake, the kind of female achievers I see nowadays has made the male-gender an ordinary tag.

18. My son, your mother have once locked up the cloth I was wearing and almost tore it because she was angry, I did not raise my hand to beat her because of a day like this, so that I can be proud to tell you that I never for once beat your mother.

19. My son, in our days, our women had more of natural beauty, though I wouldn’t lie to you, some had minor painting of their appellation mostly on their arms, the ones you people now call tattoo, but don’t forget that they didn’t expose any part of their body like your women of nowadays.

20. My son, your mother and I are not interested in what happens in your marriage, try to handle issues without always coming to us.

21. My son, remember I bought your mother’s first sewing machine for her, help your wife achieve her dreams just as you’re pursuing yours.

22. My son, don’t stop taking care of me and your mother, it’s a secret of growing old and having children to take care of you too.

23. My son, pray with your family, there is a tomorrow you don’t know, talk to God that knows everything, everyday.

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BEING LONELY VERSUS BEING WITH THE WRONG PERSON..

There are millions of women who are lonely and want to be in a relationship and millions of women who are in a relationship but with the wrong person. The woman who is by herself, because of loneliness will many times get desperate and will settle for a married man or any man. The woman who is in a relationship with the wrong person is crying herself to sleep every night because the man she is with is sleeping with other women and she knows about it.

She deals with the fact that this man constantly puts her down and lets her know that nobody would want her. She is on a daily basis dealing with lies and physical abuse. The woman who is lonely, needs to wait for the right man to come into her life and the woman who is with the wrong person, needs to make the right decision and do what is best for herself.
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STRICTLY FOR GUYS: 7 KINDS OF WOMEN U MUST NOT MARRY!

One reason people marry d wrong persons is that they follow their hunger for Sex, Companionship & other minor issues instead of taking time to check details.
Details are what makes a Person! So, here are 7 Kinds of Women you MUST not marry.

1. Don't Marry a Woman who you don't know her weaknesses! - Prov 27:12.
2. Don't marry a Woman who is Dirty & has no interest to improve herself.- Prov 30:21-23.
3. Don't Marry a Woman who is ungrateful & does not show her Love.- Prov 27:5.
4. Don't Marry a Jealous Woman who cannot Trust you!- Prov 27:4.
5. Don't marry a FOOLISH Woman, who can't solve problems by herself.- Prov 27:22.
6. Please, avoid a Contentious Woman, who enjoys quarrels, arguements & insults.-Prov27:15,16.
7. Don't marry a Woman who is not your friend & not a Friend to GOD! Prov27:10.

So, friend, the choice of whom to marry will definitely go a long way to decide how you will end here on Earth, so make the right choice !!!
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UNDERSTANDING YOUR SPOUSE'S NEEDS!

Most people rush into relationships without a basic knowledge of d 5 major needs of Man/Woman hence they try to meet & fulfill their own needs in that union not the needs of their partner.

There is no PERFECT person in Marriage, hence, Marriage is not for Perfect people, but for Matured people, who through use of wisdom, have the basic knowledge, skill and Grace to apply such in times needed.

5 major things every woman needs most are Love & Affection, Admiration, Security, Communication in intimacy & a sense of belonging.

Men on the other hand needs; Respect, Sexual fulfillment, Good Food, a clean environment & Encouragement from the woman they love!

These things may look too simple or sound too stupid but when they are overlooked, they attract deadly consequences.
Your wisdom to apply these Truths when necessary makes you prepare for a Long time Relationship with any particular person.

So, How prepared are you for MARRIAGE? God is not the author of Confusion! God can never give One of His priceless Vessels to an Unprepared person!

 — 
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TYPES OF HUSBAND AVAILABLE FOR WOMEN!

1: BACHELOR HUSBAND –
Does things on his own without consulting wife. Hangs out a lot with friends more than wife. Not serious about marriage life.

2: ACIDIC HUSBAND –
Is always boiling like acid and always angry violent, moody, dominating and very dangerous.

3: SLAVE HUSBAND –
Want to be treated like Kings and treats wife like a slave. Likes wife to perform old tradition respect and hates being called by their first name.

4: GENERAL HUSBAND -
Husband for every woman. Loves and cares for girlfriends more than his wife. Likes giving money to girlfriends and has more female friends.

5: DRY HUSBAND -
Very moody and stingy; doesn't consider wife's emotions and doesn't make the relationship enjoyable. Has no sense of humor.

6: PANADOL HUSBAND -
Uses wife as problem solver, only loves wife when needing something from her. Is clever and knows wife's weaknesses and capitalize on that to get relief from wife.

7: PARASITE HUSBAND -
Lazy and only loves wife for the sake of money. Use wife's money on girlfriends. Not initiative and does not help wife with house responsibilities.

8: BABY HUSBAND -
Irresponsible and childish and can't make decisions on his own without asking his mother or relatives; compares wife to relatives and runs to them always if something goes wrong.

9: VISITING HUSBAND -
Not always at home. Comes home like a visitor. Provides the family with all material needs but has no time for them.

10: CARING HUSBAND-
Caring and loving. Provides both material and emotional needs and also makes time for the family. Takes care of his in-laws. Guides home spiritually. Very responsible and treats wife as partner and helper.Has no other sex partner except the wife and he loothes being unfaithful to his dear wife.

11. GROWING HUSBAND-
Understands that neither him nor his wife is Perfect. Allow mistakes, learns from them and forgives without using her past against her. Has made up his mind to love and grow old with just One woman for the rest of his life. Learns what she needs, how to be better and improves daily.

DEAR MEN:
What type of husband are you or will you be?
DEAR LADY:
What type of husband do you want?
God is listening; Ask and it shall be given to you!

 —
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5 SOLID REASONS WHY YOU MUST LIVE A LIFE OF PURPOSE...

KEY THOUGHTS:
1. Living without purpose is living to no profit

2. A life without reason is a life without results

THE NECESSITY OF LIVING ON PURPOSE
(LESSONS FROM SAMSON’S LIFE (Judges 16:16-20))

1. Where there is no purpose, there is no discipline:
Purposelessness is the reason for carelessness and recklessness in life.

2. Where there is no purpose, the future lacks meaning:People without purpose  live with only the moment in mind.

3. Where there is no purpose, there can be no plans:
Whenever you have no plans for your life, you end up living the plans of other people.

4. Where there is no purpose, there is a bankruptcy of wisdom:
Nothing provokes and fertilizes mentality like purpose. People operate under a very high level of foolishness where there is no purpose.

5. Where there is no purpose, regret is unavoidable.

WHAT PEOPLE REGRET ABOUT:
a. The regret of missed opportunities
b. The regret of wasted time
c. The regret of unwise actions
d. The regret of a negative future

COUNSELS:
1. Absolutely refuse to live a life of no purpose.
2. Do all you can to arrive at the understanding of God’s purpose for your life.

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5 THINGS EVERY WOMAN WANTS IN A MAN..

1. LEADERSHIP- Every woman admires a Man who knows what he wants in Life and how to get it! They want a Man who is not controlled by his Parents! They want a Man who can lead them right.

2. HONOUR- Evry woman wants a Man who can honour them with pleasantries and praises! Women desire Men who see the beauty in them and Value them above other women!

3. UNDERSTANDING- Any wise Woman would appreciate a Man who understands their needs and personalities! Women love men who pay the price just to listen to them and know them better! Understand their past, present and future. Understand their potentials, principles and Temperament!

4. SECURITY- Women love men who make them feel loved and secured! Men who they can tell their fears, their mistakes, their dreams yet be themselves!

5. HUMOUR- Women love Men who make them Laugh!
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Never Ignore This!!!

Don't trample on people on your way UP, because you may need them on your way DOWN!
Never ignore people, especially those who helped you when you were a Nobody!
The person that looks insignificant today can be your boss tomorrow; so learn how to be nice to everyone.
Show kindness and reap friendship.

STRICTLY FOR SINGLES. WHO SHOULD I MARRY?

WHO SHOULD I MARRY?

1. MARRY YOUR FRIEND
* One who is faithful to you.
* Reproves you sincerely with RESPECT.
* Improves you daily.
* Edifies your Spirituality & Character.
* Nourishes your Spirit, Soul & Body.
* Defends you, especially in your absence.

2. MARRY A GOD-PERSON.
* One who is born-again.
* One who carries the presence & Grace of God.
* One who challenges you to improve in your work for God.
* One who has a Pastor over him/her.
* One who can be changed by the Word of God.

3. MARRY SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS YOU
* UR TEMPERAMENT
* UR PURPOSE
* UR LOVE LANGUAGE
* UR GIFTS & TALENTS.

4. MARRY SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO GROW WITH YOU.
* Is interested in becoming a better friend.
* Knows that you are not perfect and is willing to accept you the way you are.
* Someone who COMPLIMENTS YOU!

Next to Hell Fire, the worst place to be in life is to be in a Marriage that is not working.So get it right ...